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Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters (Review)

Attention everyone involved with Abraham Lincoln : Vampire Hunter; get out some sticky pads and take some fucking notes. Hansel and Gretel : Witch Hunters may sound like something you'd stumble across on the Sy-Fy network but truth be told it's actually visually stunning at times. As the movie begins we see the beginning of the traditional tale of two children coming across a house constructed of candy where they encounter a witch. Instead of outwitting it however , they burn it after the realization that Witch juju has no effect on them.



Roughly 20 years later we see Jeremy Renner and Gemma Arterton playing the clasc characters as renowned witch hunters. They intrude onto a town which has been having frequent mysterious kidnappings that are suspected to be the doing of witches. There may be nothing terrifying about the movie itself but the witches look twistedly demonic and frankly just aesthetically awesome. I can't go on because... well that's about as deep as it gets. There are some predictable plot twists and unnecessary random love interests but fortunately none of the movies flaws get into the way of the reason you probably want to see it. The movie is filled to the brim with dazzling action that makes great use of visual effects , witchcraft, and telekines. It's also all rounded out with a healthy dose of decapitations and gallons of blood.

There are some annoyances though I have to bring up. There's a troll in the movie which I wasn't expecting and unfortunately its CGI isn't that great and it kind of feels misplaced as a whole. Once again , you'll probably be predicting the movie every step of the way. Finally , it feels like Director Tommy Wirkola just didn't really know how to give Gretel some memorable moments as for a good portion of the movie you'll just be thinking " This lady getting her ass kicked is a witch hunter?". It doesn't help that Hansel's character never encounters any real danger. It's to the point where he always has a solution or just stumbles onto safety. Oh yeah, the romance subplot is forgettable , ineffective , and stupid.

Overall I came into my theater wondering why the hell this was getting an Imax 3D run of all privileges and came away wishing I did shell out some extra cash for Imax. It's an aesthetically pleang action packed and unique take on a fairy tale that's ultimately fun to watch once.
Shakelford, J. Rusty Friday 1/25/2013 at 03:23 PM | 99842